the sound of a train whistle in the dark is very lonely.
May 31, 2008
May 30, 2008
on a happier note......oh wait, maybe not.
The 'happier note' referring to the three adorable kittens born on my birthday in our barn.
The 'maybe not' referring to the death of one of the four kittens born a week after my birthday in our barn.
The 'maybe not' referring to the death of one of the four kittens born a week after my birthday in our barn.
May 29, 2008
May 28, 2008
she sees love where anyone else would see weeds...Lord search my heart, create in me something clean; dandelions, You see flowers in these weeds.
A blur of yellow spreads out for miles before you. One sees an ugly field of weeds. Weed upon weed upon weed. The other sees a vast array of beautiful flowers. What do you see?
What does God see? Weeds or flowers in your life? If He sees weeds, He can change them into flowers you know. Just go talk to Him. Confess to Him. Pour it out before Him. Ask Him to change those ugly weeds into beautiful flowers.
A glorious array of yellow!
Title attributed to "Dandelions" by FIF.
wrench.
Just when you think you have everything all planned out perfectly.
God changes things.
Reminds you that He's in control, not you.
And His plan is always the best.
God changes things.
Reminds you that He's in control, not you.
And His plan is always the best.
even in control of the small things: like camp.
May 26, 2008
tired?
three weeks to exam.
another LW done.
lots of driving.
burned to a crisp.
warm weather finally.
hanging out with people.
wisdom teeth? ugh.
another LW done.
lots of driving.
burned to a crisp.
warm weather finally.
hanging out with people.
wisdom teeth? ugh.
May 22, 2008
may 22
amy and monica have officially been out of the country for one month now. is that even possible? i feel like that month has crawled by. but amy? she feels that it has flown by, and doesn't want only two months to be left.
May 21, 2008
"carol-lee, you're so cool!"
I made a discovery: I don't know how to take compliments.
Yes, I turn red. But I also never know what to say, or deny what someone is complimenting me on, or say something really stupid.
It would probably be beneficial to just say thank you, or leave my reply to the blush on my face.
I don't really like compliments, actually. I mean, I do like them, and I don't let them go to my head, because that's just a really stupid thing to do. But compliments are something I find really awkward to take.
Yes, I turn red. But I also never know what to say, or deny what someone is complimenting me on, or say something really stupid.
It would probably be beneficial to just say thank you, or leave my reply to the blush on my face.
I don't really like compliments, actually. I mean, I do like them, and I don't let them go to my head, because that's just a really stupid thing to do. But compliments are something I find really awkward to take.
May 20, 2008
simple poetry
oh what peace we often forfeit
oh what needless pain we bear
all because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer
oh what needless pain we bear
all because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer
in love...
...with my Savior.
Selah singing hymns, reading Psalms, playing praise songs, walking in God's newly budding creation.
Thinking on love. What it means to love. Love people.
Love GOD.
What God's demonstration of love means. In life. For eternity.
Talking to someone across the ocean and hearing the power of God, the crazy things that happen, the learning process of trust and joy in everything.
Considering all the people in my life.
Feeling BLESSED beyond all I could ever think, ever imagine, ever could think to ask for. Why me??? Why Lord? Such irresistible love!
Now to Him who is able to do
immeasurably more
than all we ask
or imagine,
according to His power
that is at work
within us.
Ephesians 3:20
Selah singing hymns, reading Psalms, playing praise songs, walking in God's newly budding creation.
Thinking on love. What it means to love. Love people.
Love GOD.
What God's demonstration of love means. In life. For eternity.
Talking to someone across the ocean and hearing the power of God, the crazy things that happen, the learning process of trust and joy in everything.
Considering all the people in my life.
Feeling BLESSED beyond all I could ever think, ever imagine, ever could think to ask for. Why me??? Why Lord? Such irresistible love!
Now to Him who is able to do
immeasurably more
than all we ask
or imagine,
according to His power
that is at work
within us.
Ephesians 3:20
May 17, 2008
the most excellent way.
why is it that it is so hard? to love people as you should? to be selfless and sincere?
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Romans 12:9-11
Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Romans 12:16
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Romans 12:9-11
Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Romans 12:16
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
May 16, 2008
one, two, three, or four? which type are you? a combo? me too!
I was reading a book on teaching today. There were a few chapters on character types. I always find these kind of things really interesting...and usually kind of embarrassing once I discover what my 'type' is. In this case, I'm a mix of two...possibly three. What are you???
Type Casting
from
That's a Good Question
by Marienne Uszler
Follow-ers. Some people are literal and factual. They respond to order and are willing to obey rules, but they also expect others to do the same and are uncomfortable, perhaps resentful, if this isn't the case. They try to do what's expected, but they always want to know exactly what's expected, and they're seldom interested to go beyond any stated perimeters. They're usually dependable, and feel they should be rewarded for this. They want to know what and where the boundaries are.
Do-ers. Other people are interested in facts and activities as long as they find them attractive or useful. For them, it's more important to be active than to follow procedures. They like to plunge right in, without preparation or guidance, trusting their instincts. Their interests can be short-lived, and they hope from one activity to another with no care as to whether the activity is completed or successful, often abandoning the activity if they meet any snags.
Think-ers. Then there are the people who, though they can quickly grasp facts and store them for future use, always want to know what's behind the facts, why they're true. They're sometimes willing to follow rules, but often feel that they can jump ahead and second-guess what the outcome should be. They love working alone, thinking through things at their own speed, making their own plans. They enjoy research and can be very persistent tracking down details that seem important to them.
Feel-ers. For some people, feeling are far more important than facts. They follow rules largely because they know that will please others. They wish to like, and be liked. They enjoy working in groups because this offers human interactions and sometimes gives them a chance to help others (which they love to do). Because they live close to their own emotions, they can't function well if they feel that anything is "wrong", or if they or someone else may be "hurting".
Type Casting
from
That's a Good Question
by Marienne Uszler
Follow-ers. Some people are literal and factual. They respond to order and are willing to obey rules, but they also expect others to do the same and are uncomfortable, perhaps resentful, if this isn't the case. They try to do what's expected, but they always want to know exactly what's expected, and they're seldom interested to go beyond any stated perimeters. They're usually dependable, and feel they should be rewarded for this. They want to know what and where the boundaries are.
Do-ers. Other people are interested in facts and activities as long as they find them attractive or useful. For them, it's more important to be active than to follow procedures. They like to plunge right in, without preparation or guidance, trusting their instincts. Their interests can be short-lived, and they hope from one activity to another with no care as to whether the activity is completed or successful, often abandoning the activity if they meet any snags.
Think-ers. Then there are the people who, though they can quickly grasp facts and store them for future use, always want to know what's behind the facts, why they're true. They're sometimes willing to follow rules, but often feel that they can jump ahead and second-guess what the outcome should be. They love working alone, thinking through things at their own speed, making their own plans. They enjoy research and can be very persistent tracking down details that seem important to them.
Feel-ers. For some people, feeling are far more important than facts. They follow rules largely because they know that will please others. They wish to like, and be liked. They enjoy working in groups because this offers human interactions and sometimes gives them a chance to help others (which they love to do). Because they live close to their own emotions, they can't function well if they feel that anything is "wrong", or if they or someone else may be "hurting".
on a different note
gmail is the best.
what would i do without gmail and its incredible organization?
what would i do without gmail and its incredible organization?
the one i miss.
Weirded out.
So when I synced my zen to my computer the first time, it synced all of the playlists from my media player, as well as all the music. One of the playlists was Amy's playlist. I listened to it last night...and started missing her. She had some good, sad songs on it.
Then I get up this morning and check my email and my blog, and find one of Amy's favorite verses on my blog, Zephaniah 3:17.
I love you Amy. And I don't know if you're starting to miss home yet, but I'm starting to miss you.
So when I synced my zen to my computer the first time, it synced all of the playlists from my media player, as well as all the music. One of the playlists was Amy's playlist. I listened to it last night...and started missing her. She had some good, sad songs on it.
Then I get up this morning and check my email and my blog, and find one of Amy's favorite verses on my blog, Zephaniah 3:17.
I love you Amy. And I don't know if you're starting to miss home yet, but I'm starting to miss you.
May 15, 2008
your shadow walks faster than you
So I think it's pretty sad that I don't have anything to say. Very sad. There must be something!
What have I been doing with my time this week? The time I used to spend pouring over history facts and writing harmony questions? Well...let me tell you. This week has been quite random, different, relaxing, lazy, enjoyable, and strange. If one word could describe it, I think weird would be close to appropriate. Out of the ordinary, that's for sure.
This week, about 2 hours of tuesday, wednesday and friday are/will be spent watching my piano teacher, and a friend of hers, teach. If I get nothing else out of this excersise, I am being inspired. I will be satisfied with that. Being inspired to be a better teacher. To stretch myself and get out of the box in teaching.
But I am not only being inspired. I'm learning tricks too. Teaching tricks. But if you want to know those tricks, you'll have to either take piano lessons from me or have your kids take piano lessons from me in the future. Tehe.
I've also been biking with my brothers everyday...except yesterday 'cause it rained:( Yes, biking. I figure, I have to get back into shape, before I go to work again and they kill me the first day! I'm pretty sure that would happen, because I've been "sitting around" all winter, either at my desk, at a piano, in a church pew, in a car, or on the couch. That's a lot of sitting. So, bring on the sun and get me on that bike!!
Hmm...what else. Oh! I made two random, surprise visits. One was made to Nadine. That was fun...she was kind of speechless when she opened the door. 'Twas a rare sight. 'What are you doing here?'...and Dan and Chris laughing because they already knew I was coming. Love you Nadine! The other visit was made to Anton...who else? Well, it was only half a surprise, cause we kind of talked about me coming on Tuesday night, but we didn't really confirm it. I called his mom and then I was there before he got home from work. Yup. I've decided that I should do surprise visits more often. They're a lot of fun!! Try it sometime.
I also started reading C.S.Lewis's Screwtape Letters. All I can say about that is 'wow.' They're a must-read. How did Lewis come up with this stuff? Is it truly how demon's work? They sure are crafty, and I definitely don't ever want to let them twist my thoughts in such ways. (haha...did you know that C.S.Lewis used the phrase "ish"??)
The best thing, where it is possible, is to keep the patient (we are reffered to as 'patients'!) from the serious intention of praying altogether...if this fails, you must fall back on a subtler misdirection of his intention...The simplest is to turn their gaze away from Him towards themselves. Keep them watching their own minds and trying to produce feelings there by the action of their own wills...But even if He defeats your first attempt at misdirection, we have a subtler weapon. The humans do not start from that direct perception of Him which we, unhappily, cannot avoid...If you examine the object to which he is attending, you will find that it is a composite object containing many quite ridiculous ingredients. There will be images derived from pictures of the Enemy (God.) as He appeared during the discreditable episode known as the Incarnation...I have known cases where what the patient called his "God" was actually located - up and to the left at the corner of the bedroom ceiling, or inside his own head, or in a crucifix on the wall. But whatever the nature of the composite object, you must keep him praying to it. - page 195-96
But anyway, read the whole book for yourself sometime. Add it to your summer reading list.
Other random things: I called Amy, laid on the trampoline and tried to burn, read my Bible on the trampoline even though it was a little chilly, drove Kim to drivers-ed, got a Birthday card in the mail from Steve and Amy (and baby!), listened/listening to lots of Jack Johnson and Coldplay.
I hope that satisfies my blog for a while. Because I've run out of things to say again.
What have I been doing with my time this week? The time I used to spend pouring over history facts and writing harmony questions? Well...let me tell you. This week has been quite random, different, relaxing, lazy, enjoyable, and strange. If one word could describe it, I think weird would be close to appropriate. Out of the ordinary, that's for sure.
This week, about 2 hours of tuesday, wednesday and friday are/will be spent watching my piano teacher, and a friend of hers, teach. If I get nothing else out of this excersise, I am being inspired. I will be satisfied with that. Being inspired to be a better teacher. To stretch myself and get out of the box in teaching.
But I am not only being inspired. I'm learning tricks too. Teaching tricks. But if you want to know those tricks, you'll have to either take piano lessons from me or have your kids take piano lessons from me in the future. Tehe.
I've also been biking with my brothers everyday...except yesterday 'cause it rained:( Yes, biking. I figure, I have to get back into shape, before I go to work again and they kill me the first day! I'm pretty sure that would happen, because I've been "sitting around" all winter, either at my desk, at a piano, in a church pew, in a car, or on the couch. That's a lot of sitting. So, bring on the sun and get me on that bike!!
Hmm...what else. Oh! I made two random, surprise visits. One was made to Nadine. That was fun...she was kind of speechless when she opened the door. 'Twas a rare sight. 'What are you doing here?'...and Dan and Chris laughing because they already knew I was coming. Love you Nadine! The other visit was made to Anton...who else? Well, it was only half a surprise, cause we kind of talked about me coming on Tuesday night, but we didn't really confirm it. I called his mom and then I was there before he got home from work. Yup. I've decided that I should do surprise visits more often. They're a lot of fun!! Try it sometime.
I also started reading C.S.Lewis's Screwtape Letters. All I can say about that is 'wow.' They're a must-read. How did Lewis come up with this stuff? Is it truly how demon's work? They sure are crafty, and I definitely don't ever want to let them twist my thoughts in such ways. (haha...did you know that C.S.Lewis used the phrase "ish"??)
The best thing, where it is possible, is to keep the patient (we are reffered to as 'patients'!) from the serious intention of praying altogether...if this fails, you must fall back on a subtler misdirection of his intention...The simplest is to turn their gaze away from Him towards themselves. Keep them watching their own minds and trying to produce feelings there by the action of their own wills...But even if He defeats your first attempt at misdirection, we have a subtler weapon. The humans do not start from that direct perception of Him which we, unhappily, cannot avoid...If you examine the object to which he is attending, you will find that it is a composite object containing many quite ridiculous ingredients. There will be images derived from pictures of the Enemy (God.) as He appeared during the discreditable episode known as the Incarnation...I have known cases where what the patient called his "God" was actually located - up and to the left at the corner of the bedroom ceiling, or inside his own head, or in a crucifix on the wall. But whatever the nature of the composite object, you must keep him praying to it. - page 195-96
But anyway, read the whole book for yourself sometime. Add it to your summer reading list.
Other random things: I called Amy, laid on the trampoline and tried to burn, read my Bible on the trampoline even though it was a little chilly, drove Kim to drivers-ed, got a Birthday card in the mail from Steve and Amy (and baby!), listened/listening to lots of Jack Johnson and Coldplay.
I hope that satisfies my blog for a while. Because I've run out of things to say again.
la de dah
Could it be possible? Has it actually happened?
I have nothing to post.
Thus, the lack of posts in the past few days.
I have nothing to post.
Thus, the lack of posts in the past few days.
May 12, 2008
dear friends and family
thank you for your support and encouragement and interest in the exam prep and writing the exams. God bless you all for blessing me through you.
love carol-lee
love carol-lee
dear brittni
thank you for the past two sundays. of hanging out and talking and laughing and being tired and sharing. i love you.
love carol-lee
love carol-lee
May 10, 2008
huzzah!
did 'em both.
freedom!!!...ish. two more in June......but no more history..or harmony!!
yesh! (the 'h' was intentional:P)
i actually didn't mind the harmony....but, it was time-consuming.
freedom!!!...ish. two more in June......but no more history..or harmony!!
yesh! (the 'h' was intentional:P)
i actually didn't mind the harmony....but, it was time-consuming.
May 8, 2008
little joys
oh look...you're so proud of me!!!
:)
haha
- - - - - - - - -
today i saw a small clump of tulips growing on the side of the road right in the middle of nowhere. made me happy.
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