My Second Song!

I have been writing more songs lately! Here is my second one, with more to come in the near future.

Search Me, O God
Carol-Lee J. Brouwer
Psalm 139

Verse 1:
Lord, You have searched my and known me
You know my sitting and rising up
You understand my thoughts far off
You know my path and my ways

Chorus:
Search me, O God, and know my heart
Try me and know my ever fear
And see if there is evil in me
Lead me in Your way, O Lord
Lead me in Your way, O Lord

Verse 2:
For there is no word in my mouth
That You don't, Lord, already know
You have hedged me behind an' before
You've laid Your hand upon me

Bridge:
Such knowledge is to awesome for me
It's high, I cannot attain it

I Asked the Lord

I promised my friend that I would post this song. So here it is:

I Asked the Lord

John Newton & Laura Taylor

I asked the Lord that I might grow,

In faith and love and every grace,

Might more of His salvation know,

And seek more earnestly His face.

'Twas He who taught me thus to pray,

And He I trust has answered prayer,

But is has been in such a way,

As almost drove me to despair.

I hoped that in some favored hour,

At once He'd answer my request,

And by His love's constraining power,

Subdue my sins and give me rest.

Instead of this He made me feel,

The hidden evils of my heart,

And let the angry powers of Hell,

Assault my soul in every part.

Yea more with His own hand He seemed,

Intent to aggravate my woe,

Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,

Cast out my feelings, laid me low.

"Lord why is this," I trembling cried,

"Wilt Thou pursue thy worm to death?"

"'Tis in this way," the Lord replied,

"I answer prayer for grace and faith."

"These inward trials I employ,

From self and pride to set thee free,

And break thy schemes of earthly joy,

That thou mayest seek thy all in Me."

God's Plan for Us

Jeremiah 29:11-13
For I know the thought I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope, then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart

Hebrews 13:20-21
Now may the God of peace, who brought up our Lord Jesus from the dead, that great Sheperd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make you complete in every good work to do His will, working in you what is well pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to who be glory forever and ever. Amen.

He Holds My Hand

"You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth, and called from its farthest regions, and said to you, 'You are My servant, I have chosen you and have not cast you away; fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.' . . . For I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand, saying to you, 'fear not, I will help you.' . . . The poor and needy seek water, but there is non, their tongues fail for thirst. I, the Lord, will hear them; I, the God of Israel, will not forsake them. I will open rivers in desolate heights, and fountains in the midst of the valleys; I will make the wilderness a pool of water, and the dry land springs of water. I will plant in the wilderness the cedar and the acacia tree, the myrtle and the oil tree; I will set in the desert the cypress tree and the pine and the box tree together, that they may see and know, and consider and understand together, that the hand of the Lord has done this, and the Holy One of Israel has created it." - Isaiah 41:9-10, 13, 17-20

"See, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands." - Isaiah 49:16a

"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; You are Mine." - Isaiah 43:1b

Reading the book of Isaiah is an amazing journey. Seeing God's wrath poured out against His enemies and then the beautiful imagery that describes how He gives His remnant, His chosen people, a second chance. God is so full of mercy and love! And what makes Him love a sinner? It continues to remain a mystery to me. But I know that it is a comfort that He calls me by name, He holds my hand, and He is there in every valley and trial.

Tucked Away in the Prophets

I have been reading a lot of the prophets lately, and finding some really awesome verses. I don’t know about you, but I used to think the prophets were boring to read, because I they are all about God's wrath against the evil nations. But a little while ago, a good friend of mine put a verse from Lamentations at the bottom of her email. It was a really neat verse. So I read through at least five or six whole books from the prophets in one night. And I am reading through Isaiah as well. There are some pretty powerful verses in there, especially images of God's love and protectiveness to His people.

"But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

"Therefore with joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation." Isaiah 12:3

"Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassion's fail not. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. 'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I hope in Him.' The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him. It is good that one should hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord." Lamentations 3:22-26

"The Lord you God in your midst, the Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17

"'They shall be Mine,' says the Lord of hosts, 'on the day that I make them My jewels.'" Malachi 3:17a

JOY

I have been reading "Wonders Never Cease" by Phil Callaway. The last chapter was my favorite, especially this part, "After all these years and all the things I've seen, I still find each day too short for all the prayers I want to pray, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see. The longer I live, the more I'm coming to love God. And the more I love Him, the more I find to be thankful for."

Everyday, I learn to love God more as well. Even when it seems like my life is a repeat; week after week, doing the same old things. But life is so much more than just living, it is living for God! He created us for one purpose, to bring glory to Him. What an amazing calling! It is so easy to forget that we have a high calling, and to become bored with life. But in Christ there is a so much joy and overwhelming happiness and thankfulness for all the blessings He gives us.

Today, I was sitting in my room, listening to music, and I decided to come up with a Bible verse for each letter of my middle name, Joy. The words will probably seem a little strange when you read them, but the verses will explain why I chose them. The first verse speaks of our joy in Christ, and my church gave it to me when I did profession of faith. The second one says that we can turn to God for comfort when we are lost, afraid, or just feeling down. The last one is a simple description of our service to Him as His children.

Joy - "Therefore with joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation." Isaiah 12:3

Overwhelmed - "From the end of the earth I will cry to You, when my heart is overwhelmed; lead me to the rock that is higher than I." Psalm 61:2

Yoke - "For My yoke is easy and My burden is light." Matthew 11:30

The Reason for Music

"Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; For it is pleasant, and praise is beautiful." - Psalm 147:1

While I was studying my music history the other day, I found some quotes about music that I thought were pretty neat.

"Music is to me the perfect expression of the soul." - Robert Schumann

"These harmonic notes are the language of the soul and the instruments of the heart." - Barbara Strozzi

"Music [is] the favorite passion of my soul." - Thomas Jefferson

"The practice of [music] is . . . a great part of my inner self. To me, it is the very air I breathe." - Clara Schumann

"We know by experience that song has great force and vigor to move and influence the hearts of men to invoke and praise God with a more passionate zeal." - John Calvin

So often when I play music, whether it be classical music, hymns, or praise music, it plays with my emotions . . . of joy, thankfulness, and praise. I have told people over and over that I don't know what I would do without music. It is me, my career, the one thing that I probably would have the hardest time letting go of in this world.

But music is not only about our soul and emotions, it is first and foremost about bringing praise and glory to God, who is the Creator of music. Here are two amazing quotes that I found from two early composers.

"The aim and final reason of all music should be nothing else but the Glory of God and the refreshment of the spirit." - Johann Sebastian Bach

"Our wisest mortals have decided that music should give zest to divine worship. If people take great pains to compose beautiful music for profane [secular] songs, they should devote at least as much thought to sacred song, nay, even more than to mere worldly matters." - Giovanni Pierluigi da Palestrina

'Til the Storm Passes By

Last week, a good friend of mine shared this song with my sister and I. It is based on Isaiah 25:4 which says "For You have been strength to the poor, a strength to the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat; for the blast of the terrible ones is as storm against the wall." It is such a comfort to know that God is there for us whenever we need Him.

'Til the Storm Passes By by Mosie Lister

In the dark of the midnight, Have I oft hid my face, While the storm howls above me, And there's no hiding place, 'Mid the crash of the thunder, Precious Lord, hear my cry, "Keep me safe 'til the storm passes by."

'Til the storm passes over, 'Til the thunder sounds no more, Til the clouds roll forever from the sky, Hold me fast, let me stand, In the hollow of Thy hand, Keep me safe 'til the storm passes by.

Many times Satan whispered, "There is no need to try, For there's no end of sorrow, There's no hope by and by", But I know Thou art with me, And tomorrow I'll rise, Where the storm never darkens the skies.

When the long night has ended, And the storms come no more, Let me stand in Thy presence, On that bright, peaceful shore, In that land where the tempest, Never comes, Lord, may I, Dwell with Thee when the storm passes by.

God Knows Me!

Yesterday, we had a sermon on Psalm 139. I was struck once again with how awesome God is, and with the greatness of His love for us. He knows everything about us; He knows what we are feeling or thinking, even before we express anything to Him. There is nothing about us that we can hide from Him because He knows it all. He is always there, in every step we take, whether it be good or bad; He is there watching us.

Psalm 139:1-6, 23-24
O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
You comprehend my path and my lying down,
And are aquainted with all my ways.
For there is not a word on my tongue,
But behold, O Lord, You know it all together.
You have hedged me behind and before,
And laid You hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
It is high, I cannot attain it.
Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting.

His Joy's Gonna Be My Strength

At our last Living Worship evening(s), we did the song "Trading My Sorrows." I love the words of the verse. They come straight from 2 Corinthians 7:10.

"I'm pressed but not crushed, persecuted not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed; I am blessed beyond the curse for His promise will endure, that His joy's gonna be my strength; though the sorrow may last for the night, His joy comes with the morning."

I just think it is so amazing that in whatever we go through, God is there with His children every step of the way. We are not abandoned or destroyed because our strength comes from God, who will help us through every struggle. A devotional written by Andrew Murray says this,

"The dangers we face are often very real and dark. The situation, whether in the temporal or spiritual life, may appear to be utterly hopeless. There is always one hope: God's eye is on us. That eye sees the danger, sees in tender love His trembling and waiting child, sees the moment when the heart is ripe for the blessing, and sees the way in which it is to come. The psalmist said, 'the eye of the Lord is in those who fear Him, on those who hope in His mercy, to deliver their soul from death, and to keep them alive in famine' (Psalm 33:18-19). He does not say the Lord will prevent the danger of death and famine - this is often needed to stir up people to wait on Him. He says the Lord will deliver and keep alive. He walks with us through hardships and heartaches. Oh, the faithfulness of our God, who is a very present help in every time of trouble, a shield and defense against every danger. During the utmost spiritual famine, and when death appears to prevail, wait on God. He does deliver; He does keep alive."

(Pg. 66)

Hebrews 4:15 "Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Hebrews 2:17-18 "Therefore, in all things He had to be made like His brethren, that He might be a merciful and faithful High Priest in things pertaining to God . . . "

I'm going to close this entry with a song by Selah.

"When I am down, and oh, my soul, so weary; when troubles come, and my heart burdened be; then I am still, and wait here in this silence, until You come and sit a while with me. You raise me up so I can stand on mountains, You raise me up to walk on stormy seas; I am strong when I am on Your shoulders, You raise me up to more than I can be."

Psalm 71

About a month and a half ago, I was memorizing Psalm 71 and decided to try writing a song for the first time! Last week, I played it for some of my good friends, and they really liked it, so I thought I would share it here.

Strong Refuge
By Carol-Lee J Brouwer
Psalm 71

Be my strong refuge, O Lord
To which I may turn continually
You've given the command to save
For You are my rock and my fortress

Let my mouth be filled with Your praise
And Your glory all the day
Then my soul, which You have redeemed
Shall sing unto Your name

I'll go in the strength of the Lord
I'll sing of all Your righteousness
Your awesome and wonderful love
Is greater than I can imagine

Chorus

But I will hope contiually
I'll praise You yet more and more

Chorus

Your Love is Amazing!

Once again I have been struck this weekend by how much God loves us.

"O Lord, You have searched my and known me, You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word on my tongue, but behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. You have hedged my behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain it." Psalm 139:1-6

"He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all . . . For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities not powers, not things present nor things to come, not height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:32a, 38, 39

Your love is extravagant, Your friendship is intimate; I feel like moving to the rhythm of Your grace, Your fragrance is intoxicating in the secret place; Your love is extravagant. Spread wide in the arms of Christ is a love that covers sin; no greater love have I ever known; You consider me a friend. Capture my heart again. Casting Crowns

God's Love

I am reading a book called "Recapture the Wonder" by Ravi Zacharias, and I found this quote. I thought I would share it.

"We forget the immensity of the truth that God loves us just as we are, in the frailty and the struggle with which we live." (page 114)

I thought it wrapped up nicely what I have been saying in some of my previous blogs.

Bernard of Clairvaux wrote this,

"What language shall I borrow, to thank Thee, dearest Friend
For this Thy dying sorrow, Thy pity without end?
Oh, make me Thine forever, and should I fainting be,
Lord, let me never, never, outlive me love for Thee."

Prayer

I have been thinking a lot about prayer lately. So here are a bunch more things that I have been thinking about, in addition to what I posted the other week about prayer.

"Our fellowship with God is meant for all the day. The blessing of securing a habit of true meditation during the morning devotions will be that we will be brought nearer the blessedness of the man mentioned in the first psalm: 'blessed is the man whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law he meditates day and night.'" - Andrew Murray

"Prayer in our own strength brings no blessing. Take time to present yourself reverently and in quietness before God. Remember His greatness, holiness, and love. . . . Conversation with the Father is colored by the needs of the day. Let your prayer be something definite, arising either out of the Word that you have read or out of the real soul-needs you long to have satisfied. . . . Become an intercessor, and you will experience the blessedness of prayer as you find out that God will use you to share His blessings with others through prayer." - Andrew Murray

"On waking in the morning, God will be his (the Christians) first thought. He must set aside time for prayer and resolve to give God time to hear his requests and reveal Himself to him. Then he may speak out all his desires to God and expect and answer. Later on in the day, even if only for a few minutes, he will take time to keep up the fellowship with God. And again in the evening, a quiet period is necessary to review the day's work and with confession of sin receive the assurance of forgiveness." - Andrew Murray

Take time to be holy, Speak oft with the Lord; Abide in Him always, And feed on His Word; Make friends of God’s children, Help those who are weak, Forgetting in nothing His blessing to seek.

Take time to be holy, The world rushes on; Spend much time in secret With Jesus alone; By looking to Jesus, Like Him thou shalt be; Thy friends in thy conduct, His likeness shall see

Take time to be holy, Let Him be thy Guide; And run not before Him, Whatever betide; In joy or in sorrow Still follow thy Lord, And looking to Jesus, Still trust in His Word.

Take time to be holy, Be calm in thy soul; Each thought and each motive Beneath His control; Thus led by His Spirit To fountains of love, Thou soon shalt be fitted For service above. - George C. Stebbins

And again one of my favorite verses: "Trust in the Him at all times, you people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us." - Psalm 62:8

Passages from Romans

"Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God." Romans 8: 26-27

"I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." Romans 12:1-2

Interesting Comment

Yesterday morning, Pastor Heiberg said something in his sermon that I found really interesting. He said that this world of technology has contact with the other side of the world through cell phones and satellite, but it has lost contact with heaven (and God). This was said in light of the story of Jacob and the ladder to heaven, in Genesis 28:10-22. The neat thing about this story is that Jacob had just stolen the birthright from his brother Esau, and now he was running away from home so his brother couldn't get revenge on him. Jacob had not made this sin right with God yet, but still God showed Himself and talked to Jacob in a dream. He even told him that he would be a great nation, and that He would stay with Jacob and protect him. God promised all of this to Jacob even after he rebelling and sinned against God. What an amazing and gracious God we have!

Gift of Prayer

Pray often;

It is a shield to the soul,

A sacrifice to God,

And a scourge for Satan.

- John Bunyan

I have been reading some Bible passages about prayer over and over lately. I find it so hard to pray without letting my mind wander. And I know that I am not the only one that struggles with this. One thing that helps me is to think about who I am praying to: a God who is merciful enough to look on terrible sinners like us and listens to our problems. And He doesn’t just listen to them, but He actually loves us so much that He wants us to cast all of our cares and troubles on Him so that He can carry the burden and help us through them. (1 Peter 5:6-7) Isn’t that amazing? Here are some of my favorite passages about prayer that are really neat.

“I have put the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved.” Psalm 16:8 If God is always right beside us, we know we can call on Him at any time and He will hear us.

“Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us.” Psalm 62:8 We are called to actually pour out our hearts to God! He wants to hear our struggles and know that He is there for us.

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:5-6 If we truly pray in faith, the peace of God, which is too wonderful to comprehend, will shield us.

“Continue earnestly in prayer, being vigilant in it with thanksgiving.” Colossians 4:2

“But the end of all things is at hand; therefore be serious and watchful in your prayers.”

1 Peter 4:7 Being vigilant means to be watchful, guarded, and alert. Christians are called to be watchful in their prayers, and that means we have to put everything else out of our thoughts when we pray to God, and realize whose presence we are in.

“If My people called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, them I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land. Now My eyes will be open and My ears attentive to prayer made in this place.” Chronicles 8:14-15 Humility in prayer before God is very important; we are speaking to God, who is our Creator and Sustainer! This passage also speaks of the power of prayer.

I was listening to this song the other day, and I thought it was really neat how when we pray to God in the secret place, He is there and will hear us. I also like the part about how we are “pushing every hindrance aside” so that we can focus on Him above all. That is our daily struggle in prayer, to put aside every other thought and just come before God “in the secret and quiet place.”

In the secret, in the quiet place

In the stillness You are there

In the secret, in the quiet hour I wait only for You

‘Cause I want to know You more

I want to know You, I want to hear Your voice

I want to know You more

I want to touch You, I want to see Your face

I want to know You more

I am reaching for the highest goal

That I might receive the prize

Pressing onward, pushing every hindrance aside out of my way

‘Cause I want to know You more

Praise the Lord!

"Praise the Lord! Praise God in His sanctuary; Praise Him in His mighty firmament! Praise Him with the timbrel and dance; Praise Him with stringed instruments and flutes! Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!" Psalm 150:1, 4, 6

Yesterday, my sisters Amy and Kimberly, and I played our flute, guitar, and violin sitting on the counters in the kitchen. (There are some awesome acoustics in there!) We played a whole bunch of praise songs off the top of our heads. I love being able to play praise songs with my sisters. Dad sat in the dining room listening to us. He loves listening to us play, no matter what kind of music it is.

One of our family's favorite praise songs is "Sanctuary".

Lord, prepare me

To be a sanctuary

Pure and holy

Tried and true

With thanksgiving

I'll be a living

Sanctuary for You

It is You, Lord

Who came to save us

The heart and soul of every man

It is You, Lord

Who knows my weakness

Who gives me strength

With Thine own hand

Lead me on, Lord

From temptation

Purify me

From within

Fill my hear with

Your Holy Spirit

Take away all my sin

"Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; For it is pleasant, and praise is beautiful." Psalm 147:1

Awesome God

Last night on the way home from a Living Worship practice, I was listening to this song and realized once again how awesome our God is. I stand in awe of His majesty, His workmanship, and His love for me! This song simply says that when we think of His awesome goodness and love, we are speechless.

I'm finding myself at a loss for words

And the funny thing is it's okay

The last thing I need is to be heard

But to hear what You would say

Word of God speak, would You pour down like rain

Washing my eyes to see Your majesty

To be still and know that You're in this place

Please let me stay and rest in Your holiness

Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You

Beyond the music beyond the noise

All that I need is to be with You

And in the quiet I hear Your voice

Meditating on His Word is such a blessing. There are so many passages that are just filled with praise to God, and with comfort for our souls. Psalm 103

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving! I had such a wonderful time with family and friends. But most importantly, remembering all of the blessing that God has given me. While I was out this weekend, whether driving or hiking, I loved to look at the beautiful fall leaves and think of what an awesome and amazing God I serve!

After our dinner, my family shared with each other some of the things that we have been thankful for over the past year. I am thankful for:

My family - God has given me a wonderful family that loves the Lord.

My parents - I am blessed with parents that care about me and love me. They love the Lord, and have taught me in His ways. Sometimes they seem annoying, but then I think about why they are so careful and I realize that they only love me and want to keep me from getting hurt.

Friends - I have some really amazing friends that I can share things with and talk to. You know who you are and I thank God for you a lot.

Faith - I am most thankful that God has chosen me to be one of His chosen people. It has been a year since I made profession of faith, and I have grown so much in that year. I am still mystified as to why He would choose me to be one of His daughters.

Music - God has blessed me with the gift of making music, and the opportunity to serve Him through it, whether in church, in our youth group, or in my job.

"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20

"Oh, give thanks to the Lord! Call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples! Sing to Him, sing psalms to Him; Talk of all His wondrous works! Glory to His name; Let the hearts of those rejoice who seek the Lord! Seek the Lord and His strength; Seek His face forevermore! Remember His marvelous works which He has done. His wonders, and the judgements of His mouth." Psalm 105:1-5

"Bless the Lord, O my soul; And all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, And forget not all His benefits." Psalm 103:1-2